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Nov 2010 05

Game Review: Star Wars The Force Unleashed 2

Games Review

FU2
FU Again er 2...

I never played the first Force Unleashed game and I sorta regretted it as I knew several folks who said it was a pretty good game..  So I was really excited when they announced a Force Unleashed 2 for the PC.    I figured that I'd finally get to try what everyone was talking about..

Well I've tried it..  What a piece of shit..  This is quite honestly the first game that has pissed me off in a long time..  And I mean absolutely barking at the computer, pissed off..

So lets give the pros;

It's beautiful..  The graphics engine that they have used is a very nice one and it does a really good job of immersing you into the Star Wars universe..

Plus it's a console to PC port so the expected controls are pretty bad, but I have seen worse console ports in this department so I want to give them a thumbs up here.. Not great.. Certainly not as good as a native PC game, but not terribad.

Now lets talk about the cons;

The camera system.  The gameplay.. The gameplay and uh.. the gameplay!!

First lets talk about the camera system..   Whoever the asshat was that thought it was a good idea to decouple the camera system from the players perspective and force you to control the character from whatever fucked up camera angle they wanted to throw at you for any given instance, needs to be kicked in the balls while being garroted by a hairy sweaty man using a live eel..  And then shot.

The camera system makes this game nearly unplayable as you don't look in the direction you're going!!  No no you look in whatever direction either your mouse was looking at previously OR (and this is by far worse) whatever fixed camera position they want you in for that particular scene..

It makes controlling your character impossible.  This is something that does NOT translate well from a console game to a PC game.  It only serves to piss people off,  so stop it!

But that's not the worst part.  No no.

The worst part is the game play in which they decide every few minutes to throw a quicktime event at you..  For those of you that are unfamiliar with quick time events they go something like this.. PUSH E NOW!   Oh too late... You died.. Start over.

The next time it will be some other random control you have to do at exactly the right or you fail it!   Plus, the correct control request is displayed at various spots around the screen instead of in the same place..  So you never know whats coming, when.. or for how long..etc..

This shit made for crappy game play 20 years ago in Dragon's Lair and Space Ace, and it makes for crappy game play today..  It's cheap and easy for the programmers so that's why they do it.. Not because it's fun.. I can't understand how console gamers like this crap but clearly they do or they wouldn't do it..

Now.. Combine those two issues and you begin to understand why I had to stop playing every few minutes to wipe the projectile scream-spittle off my monitor..

You can't see where you're going or what you're doing because you're stuck in their camera angle and you have to perform some bullshit quick time event that borders on the impossible..

I got to the Gorgon scene (or whatever the big god of war style beasty is in the arena is called) tried it about 20 times and uninstalled the game.    It pissed me off bad enough trying to lock his arms in to the shackles but really pissed me off the next part where they throw an awkward camera angle at you followed by a fucked up quick time event and don't explain at all what you're supposed to do..Done.

This game is shit.  Lucas Arts should hang their head as it does nothing to foster good memories about the franchise, it's a painful game that isn't fun what so ever..

I'll give it 1 star for being pretty and half a star for actually not doing a bad job converting the controls to PC.. but the gameplay and camera system sink it completely.

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