Don’t rewrite reality because you’re having an identity crisis

Look, I’m not trying to be a jerk. But I’m also not going to play pretend because someone else is addicted to the dopamine rush of being offended.

Words have meaning. That’s kind of the whole point. Language is how we make sense of the world — how we describe reality. Yes, it evolves. Slowly. Over time. Through shared understanding.

What it doesn’t do is bend on command just because someone showed up with a thesaurus and a victim complex. Language 100% is mutable, but it's not something that we can just rewrite it on demand.

You don’t get to roll into the conversation, toss out your own definitions like it’s some kind of Build-a-Word workshop, and then act shocked when the rest of us don’t play along.

Here’s the deal: pronouns are not magic. They’re not sacred. They’re grammatical stand-ins, not declarations of your personal identity cosplay. And no, I’m not going to refer to you as “ze/zir” or “they/them” if you’re one person with a single set of chromosomes and a LinkedIn profile full of tech buzzwords and HR pronoun badges.

You don’t get to define your pronouns like you’re naming your Xbox avatar. That’s not how any of this works. You describe what already exists. You’re male, female, or an edge case in rare medical scenarios — not a Pokémon evolution that changes on a wish and whim.

And you absolutely do not get to demand I refer to you with your preferred third-person terms when you’re not even in the conversation. That’s not inclusion. That’s narcissism with a thesaurus.

You can’t live in your own little narrative bubble and expect the rest of society to orbit around it. That’s not how reality works. You’re not the protagonist in everyone else's story. You don’t get to manufacture a version of yourself in your head and then enforce a speech code so the rest of us don’t “break immersion.”

If I’m talking about you, not to you, and I say “he” or “she” because that’s what reality provided when you entered the chat ... that’s not me “misgendering“ you. That’s describing you with a common term.

The very idea that I now owe you any amount of mental bandwidth or worse, that I’m morally obligated to audit my words in your absence is laughably Orwellian in nature.

It’s one thing to ask for respect. It’s another thing to demand linguistic compliance from people who aren’t even talking to you. That’s not respect ... that’s control. And the moment someone tries to control your language, what they’re really trying to do is control your thoughts.

I’ll treat you with decency. I’ll treat you with honesty. But I’m not going to treat you like a Dungeons & Dragons character sheet that needs constant real-time updating depending on what identity you woke up with this morning. And I won’t treat you like a make-believe character in your headcanon storyline just because you’ve mistaken identity politics for personality.

You want to live your truth? Fine. Knock yourself out. But don’t act like the rest of us are bigots for not co-signing your personal mythology.

Reality doesn’t bend for feelings. And neither do facts.

Words mean things. If you want to reinvent yourself, go for it. But don’t drag the rest of us into your semantic hostage situation and call it progress.

That’s not how language works. That’s how cults work.